I like how these turned out. I am trying to be less critical and just enjoy these. I am HATING the ones I took on Saturday. I want to just throw them all away and not deal with them. I might. Life is too short to spend editing pictures you hate (if you're not getting paid for it!)








These were all from the Apple Fest on Sunday, by the way. It wasn't much of an Apple Fest though. It was kinda lame, but the kids had a fantastic time and I guess that is what matters!


It wasn't a bad day or evening, and I managed to get a bit done. I am waging the war on the fleas in the house. We are on the brink of infestation. We have been dealing with little baby fleas that the dogs have been bringing in from outside which promptly jump off them since they have been treated with flea stuff. I spent two hours last night spreading Borax all over the carpets and sweeping it into the cracks in the hardwood floor. I am beyond pissed that we made it through most of the year before succombing to the stupid fleas right before the weather changes and kills them all. And of course, I can't use the stuff I have used in the past to kill fleas because it's a carpet powder with serious chemicals and I don't want to have the babies crawling around on that. So I used a combination of Borax and table salt, and did the downstairs last night and put down the powder upstairs today. I vaccuumed up the downstairs after an hour but am leaving the upstairs at least 24 hours before I try vaccuuing up there, I want to be sure I really give it a chance to work up there where the kids aren't always hanging out. I am also trying to get all the stuff that has been laying on the floors washed and put away so we don't reinfest ourselves. Please please please let this work. I HATE dealing with fleas, that's why I put the stuff on the dogs. They must be all up in the yard though, I will have to spread the Borax out there too. At least it's not expensive.

Is it only Tuesday? Well, Tuesday night. It feels like it should be Friday already. Maybe that is just wishful thinking. I am kinda tired. I didn't get to bed until very late last night because of the Flea Wars and then just as soon as I got to sleep... Savino woke up crying and had to nurse. I am so over him waking up in the middle of the night. I am beginning to think he will never sleep through a night again. He hasn't in quite awhile. I have to cut him a break though, he is really working on these teeth. One of his bottom teeth in the front finally came up through, the edge of it, so he is starting to get there. The molars are still hanging out under the gums but starting to swell. His nose is starting to be much less runny, knock on wood. I hope he finds some relief soon.

I had better make the kids lunches and turn the laundry over. It. Never. Ends.

So today was a hard day for Tim. He sent me a text that he had gotten a call from a father who wanted to find out how he could get his daughter admitted to one of the inpatient programs at the hospital. This was.. Monday. Today he called the father back to find out if he had signed all the forms to release her medical records, and get approval from the insurance co. etc. and the father said it was no longer necessary. Tim asked why and the father said because the daughter had committed suicide yesterday. Tim was all torn up about it. He said he kept trying to think back whether he had asked the father if the girl needed immediate treatment or to go to the ER. It's so hard, what do you say to console someone in that situation? I just told Tim, you have to figure out how to let it go because otherwise it will eat you up. There's no way he could have known that the situation was that critical and the father said he didn't know it was that bad either. It's just very very sad. Tim takes it so personally when he can't help someone and to have something like this happen and him feel so responsible, that he wasn't able to help this girl... well, it was not a good day for him.

I have so much admiration and respect for Tim. It is so so hard to work in an adolescent psychiatric hospital. It really is. You see so many kids who have been hurt by life or more commonly, their own parents and families, who have seen violence up close and personal, or done violence to someone else. He sees kids that are so messed up... the only thing you can do is come home and hug the babies and do everything you can to make sure they never have anything bad happen to them while you still can.

So yeah, that is kind of a bummer. I just tried to have dinner ready when he got home and make it an easy evening on him.

Savino is Super Crank lately. I don't know what his deal is. I really think he is teething again! It seems impossible, this poor kid needs a break from teething! I probed inside his mouth and couldn't feel anything but noticed that there is a white ridge to the right of his bottom teeth, so maybe he is working on tooth #5. I just know the crankiness has to stop. It's ridic. I literally cannot leave the room and leave him behind. Every single time he wails like I am abandoning him. It makes it very hard to do ANYTHING. I have taken to carting him around with me and just setting him on the floor with a toy wherever I take him. It is only a temporary solution because soon enough he will be crawling, but for now it seems to work. There is the novelty of being on the floor too since I don't really set him down on the floor anywhere but the living room. I've had to sweep like twice a day to be able to do this, but if it's what it takes... Mealtimes are crazy too, he's taken to wanting a bite of this, a bite of that, a Gerber puff, a sip of milk, rinse repeat. Except if you don't figure out what he wants in time, he screams bloody murder with real tears squeezing out and falling down his cheeks. I swear I think he was pointing at his cereal bowl this morning, so I tried offering him that. I think he is too young to point, but maybe I am wrong! If he can just start communicating more, I think that will ease the frustration. He STILL isn't signing. I am trying to be consistent with offering the signs for everything but I'll admit, sometimes I just plain forget. I am trying to pay more attention to his hands too, and see if maybe I am just missing him attempting to sign something to me. We do "eat", "milk"(bottle and nursing), "all done", "kittie", and "more". He is reaching that age of being able to sign back, so hopefully soon.

Ok, well, I should be in bed. I have not been getting to bed at a good time and Savino has been up and done unpredictably again. I just wish the kid would SLEEP, give me another full nights sleep. I need it. I leave you with a park picture.

Um, can someone bring back my happy cheerful non-cranky son please? Because I don't know who this kid is. He is miserable because he's teething, these top teeth are killing him. He doesn't want his gums touched or rubbed, he doesn't really want to chew on anything, he tries and starts immediately whining and crying. He just lost it at dinner time tonight and just screamed and screamed until I picked him up and put him on my lap (he was in his high chair) and cuddled him, but eventually I needed to actually eat some dinner so I just put him in his high chair and gave him the bowl of rice cereal that he was refusing to eat and a spoon and let him make a big mess. He loved it. He was actually quiet! He spent about 20 minutes squishing it in his hands and wiping it all over his tray. He hasn't really connected that he can put food into his mouth himself and eat it, he just plays with it. He's also really freaked out by anything with any more texture than purees, I tried to give him some baked mashed sweet potato and even after straining it through a strainer he kept making these gagging faces, like the texture was too much. Which kinda sucks because baby food is not cheap compared to just baking a sweet potato and mashing it up or a banana or whatever. Oh well.

We bought Savino's "real" carseat today and installed it. I didn't realize it until today but he is actually well over the reccomended height for the infant seat, by several inches. We have been talking about moving up to the big carseat anyway, and so I just went ahead and found one that I liked and the best deal on it was at Wal-Mart so we went and picked it up. Savino is kinda 'eh' about it, I don't think he was really in the mood to appreciate how much nicer it is for him to be able to look out of the window at a higher level. He liked not having to be tied down to the infant seat though, I bought a shopping cart cover and he had a great time playing with all the toys that are attached to it while we were in the store. It's just one step further away from babyhood *sniffs*.

Poor Haley had to study this evening because she has a math test tomorrow. She was really struggling with grasping this one concept and I was having a hard time explaining it to her and helping her figure it out, we were both getting frustrated. I definitely couldn't be a teacher, I have a ton of respect for anyone who does that on a daily basis because I just got more and more frustrated with not being able to help her. Finally, I had to take a break and give Savino a bath (this was after dinner) and she calmed down and when I brought the baby back down, I gave him to Tim and we were able to work it out together by going over it really slowly, step by step. I shudder to think how it will be when she is in high school, it will kill us. I guess that's what tutors are for. I hope she does well on her math test tomorrow, she is trying really hard to pull the C+ she has in math up to a B. I told her that if she is able to pull this last C up to a B we will do something special, because she has really struggled this year with a few subjects but this is the last one that she is working on, the rest she has at least a B in. I don't want to put too much pressure on her about her grades because I think that B's are perfectly fine, but I know she is capable of really applying herself and I want her to have that feeling of pride in herself about it. She brought home like 3 A+'s on tests the other day and I lavished the praise on her, she really deserved it.

I am keeping my fingers crossed that Savino will have a restful night, his teeth are really bothering him. I gave him some Motrin before bed but he has been super incredibly fussy, I don't know if it is going to be a good night or not. I really hope these teeth get through in the next few days, I am stressed for him. This afternoon he was nursing and fell asleep, I tried to hand him off to Tim so I could fix dinner and he woke up and just lost it. He was not OK with Tim holding him, he was shrieking at the top of his lungs, his something-is-terribly-wrong shriek. He didn't stop until I came in and picked him up again. If it is going to be like this for the next week, I think I may just lose my mind.

Total and Complete Exhaustion

I have so little energy that I can't even express how little I have. I am so so so so tired. Please, PLEASE let my son sleep tonight! The last two nights have been complete hell. I thought once the teeth popped through that the hard part was over! My son has not slept more than an hour and a half stretch at all in 48 hours and has taken three 20 minute naps. I am DEAD on my feet. At least last night Tim took over from 4:30am to 6am and then I nursed the boy again and Tim changed him and got him dressed for me. But, for real, I need some sleep. I was making Savino a bottle in the middle of the night and couldn't keep my eyes open and crying from exhaustion all at the same time. It's like he's a newborn all over again, but with twice the screaming. I even gave in and gave him Tylenol in the middle of the night AND teething tablets. Tonight I gave him a dose of Motrin right after dinner and didn't let him nap AT ALL, so hopefully he will sleep a little better. Please, please, because I think I might throw myself out the window if I can't get some sleep. I am wrecked.



So, instead of lucid thought, you get more pictures. How I even managed to get half of these in focus with how bleary my eyes were all day, I don't even know. I caved and drank half a Diet Coke, I needed the caffeine.



We went to JoAnn Fabrics today so Tim could pick up some stickers for my old laptop keyboard where I have worn off the letters on half the keyboard, and I found the cutest flannel and cotton fabric that I am going to make some bibs with. I am backing them with terry/towel fabric and got a snap punch to put snaps on them with. I'm just using these ones I got handed down from Eleni as a template because I will likely be giving those back to her when she has her baby, but I will still need bibs for Savino and I LOVE these bibs of hers that I have been using that are backed in terry. They are WONDERFUL. So yeah, I am going to try and make a few. I can't wait to see how they turn out. I got half a yard of three different materials, which should be enough to make at least six bibs I think.



I tried on a pair of jeans in Target today that are two sizes smaller than the ones that I am currently wearing. I picked them up because they looked like they might fit though I was dubious about the size, and because the jeans I have now are a little too big. I need to get new jeans, but I am still working on losing the rest of the weight that I want to get off before the summer so I don't want to buy any right now. If that makes sense. Anyway, I was fully mentally braced for them to not fit and I even said to myself, "Self, I don't know why you are doing this to yourself, you will just be pissed off later!" So imagine my shock when they buttoned up! :o I didn't get them because there was something crazy going on with the rise in the waist, but I was really pleased! It was a healthy dose of motivation to keep on keepin' on and the tantalizing thought of being able to buy all my jeans in TWO SMALLER SIZES had me grinning.




I need to get a camcorder, I've come to that conclusion. My point and shoot camera takes OK video, but it's not really the best quality and I would really really like to be able to have some decent home movies for the kids when they are older, especially of things like Savino crawling, etc. I would ideally like one that you can record onto a DVD within the camcorder, but now that my laptop has a DVD burner and the desktop has a DVD burner, it's not exactly vital, so if anyone has a beloved digital camcorder that they love, please shoot me some reccomendations. I'm trying not to spend more than $300.

On that note, I am so so beat. I must get some sleep. Oh goody, my son is making noise, please let this not be the start of another restless night. I will DIE.

Even More Milestones

If it wasn't enough that Savino has decided to get up on his hands and knees and rock back and forth (and I managed to get pictures of this! Yay!), after nursing him this evening, he was pulling my hand to his mouth and trying to chew on his fingers. I put my index finger in his mouth (my hands were clean, don't worry!) to rub his gums which he seems to like, and what do I discover....

HE HAS TWO TEETH THAT JUST BROKE THROUGH HIS LOWER GUMS!

Yes, my son has just cut his first TWO teeth at the same time, both front lower teeth.

I just assumed his slight fever and crankiness was due to the shots he got yesterday, but I am almost 99% sure that they hadn't broke through yesterday, so sometime between then and 5pm tonight, they broke through. He has been in a much more mellow mood since then, though that might be because instead of giving him Motrin, I gave him some teething tablets. He has been extra drooly and just outright GNAWING on his fingers lately, but I just assumed that it was just more of the same, this prolonged teething. *sighs* I guess not!

I just want him to stop growing up for a second, because it seems like it is all happening all at once. I am freaking out over here! Is he just going to get up and walk away tomorrow? I am not in this big of a hurry for him to grow up! (And honestly, I am praying this isn't the start of a nursing battle where he wants to bite all the time, I will DIE).

I am typing this from my new laptop. It rocks. It even has a card slot for my SD card so I can put it directly into my computer rather than using my card reader. I love. I am going to dive into editing the 587 pictures I have to slog through now. Pictures tomorrow.